Okay, so im really bad at keeping up with a journal,but thats okay at least i post one once a year or so, I'm going to try and do better. Right now im getting ready to head to new jersey for the weekend. I get to go to a conference for orientation leaders. For any of my friends from SCCS that are dealing with the play YOU DID A GREAT JOB!!! Have fun with the next two nights, don't worry you will do fine. Well I will try to remember to post something when i get back on monday no guarantees though

It has been so long since i posted anything. Its been over a year and so much has happened. First thing is first I graduated from high school, I started college. I started working at Centro. I have had medical problems galore, but beyond that I've been really good. For photography class i just watched a presentation by a local photographer Kevin Rivoli. It was really cool, it showed us that it doesn't matter if we come from a small town we can still fulfill our dreams. This is coming from a man that was born in Rochester and now has a book out and is going to have a traveling exhibit with his work. It was mostly working with Norman Rockefeller's work. It was really cool, i just wish i had had the money with me to buy a book.

So, life has been a little better now that school has let out. Except for the small detail that instead of dealing with the problems of school I have to face all the problems of home that I had been trying to avoid. But, I may be getting a job soon so that will help keep me busy. I'm to the point that I just have to start getting all my thoughts somewhere but I have no where to put them so that they can be private. The only thing wrong with that is when I keep it all bottled up inside my head, it all comes back to me at all the wrong times. Well got to finish my watching a movie, and get some sleep so that hell can begin tomorrow.

Sometimes I just want to run and hide from all of the problems around me. My friends are finally talking to me again, but for me it doesn't feel the same. I think that is because I know that if they did it once they can do it again. I still don't know why they were all mad at me, I probably never will. The only good thing is that Jarrod is still with me. I hate this because I am going to invite my dad to my graduation . This is going to suck.

I hate it when people act like they are you friend, then turn around and start saying stuff about you behind your back and to your boyfriend. Then they ignore you when you ask them what is wrong. All of a sudden they just turn on you with no warning. It sucks. Also a bunch of stuff has been turned up from my past and is bringing back my memories. I have not sleep in almost two weeks because of the nightmares that have come back.